Jigga jigga, whaaat?!

To asses everywhere,
My little bro informed me that a state in the US of A is trying to pass legislation to prohibit baggy pants. With my masterful detective skills and PhD in Perefection I was able to utilize a certain search engine to "dig a little further."

Here is what I found: CLICK ME! CLICK ME!

Basically a councilman in Atlanta is trying to to make it illegal for males to show their skivvies (viz. baggy pants) and females to exhibit their thongs and/or sports bras in public (viz. being a ho-bag). The councilman, who b-t-dubs is no fashionista himself, insinuates that the overall goal here is to lift society's standards by keeping underwear hidden. Furthermore, there is a concern that instituting such laws will lead to racial profiling against young black people.

My opinion? Well I feel strongly that there are other avenues for society to improve. Education, for example. We alllll know that 1 in 5 "US Americans are unable to [locate US on a world map] uhhhh....because....uhhhh....what's a map?"Not but seriously, banning baggy pants is like banning farting. Impossible. Its like telling a frog not to hop, or the Parsons family not to be awesome. Yeah, I KNOW! But if for some reason this anti-butt floss, anti-tightie whitey law does get written in the books how are they supposed to enforce it? If you're thinking fashion police you are seriously deranged (FYI: that was most definitely a quote from 'Stick It')...they would have about as much authority as my ass in a fist fight. As for the racial profiling, perhaps people should stop dressing like walking town bicycles, or maybe YOU should stop associating baggy pants with gats! Whose the racist now, beeeeotch??

And now a moment of geniousity.

Word of the Day:

Dong sack (dong - saq)
-noun
A thin sheath, usually of very thin rubber but could be made of leaves.

[Origin: 2007; a mud puddle in Madagascar...what??? They don't have mud puddles in Madagascar?? Assface.]

WOW.

To stooopid peedpoles,

Turn your looking balls on to THE smartest most fascinating lady-speaker to have graced the planet.

Its hump day and my breath smells like onions.

Here's a cool pic of the recent lunar eclipse:

(www.mreclipse.com/LEphoto/TLE1982Jul/TLE1982seq1-2w.JPG)

Peace homeslices.

Child Abuse? Nah, more like testing the limits of an 8 year old body.

To infinity and beyond!
Hi folks. Sorry for my one day hiatus, I had other things on my mind. Other things being sleep and food and NOT in that order (a la fat kid). Anyways you know who isn't a fat kid??? This eight year old girl featured in this photo: She seems normal, as she's just you know like cruising on some form of rapid transit somewhere in the vast nation of China. Her story becomes slightly more complicated when you find out that she's recently completed a 3560 km run from her home province of Hainan to Beijing. This article in the Globe and Mail goes on to accuse her father of child abuse. The father defends himself by claiming the run was in celebration of the 2008 Olympics, and that his daughter "loves running." I don't know guys....this is a toughie. I'm not sure if I would go so far as to call it child abuse....more like molding your child to avoid the growing problem of obesity. I mean I've seen other pictures of this freak of a child and she was indeed grinning. And in the picture above she seems absolutely fascinated by the kaleidescope - her red star (hahah commie pun!) for running no less than a marathon and a half per day. So with my solid background in math I've just put two and two together and have reached the conclusion that its completely normal AND acceptable to do this to a child. Hear that future Parsons spawn??? You get a high five if you run from Vancity to Halifax, and I'll even throw in my wee bro's old collection of Big Lego if you swim across the Atlantic.

In related news, to avoid rain clouds during the coming Summer Olympics scientists have invented some sort chemical that when shot up into the sky will cause rain clouds to disippate. I think its safe to say that weather can now be checked off of the things China has defeated.

In unrelated news, here's a pic of giraffes making out...